Rough

I like rough sex, I almost beg for my partner to get rough with me but when is it too rough or on the contrary not rough enough. Everyone is different obvs = obviously, (I’m trying these short cuts words thing out!) everyone is different therefore pain/pleasure tolerance will vary, but in the same breath there is a line that you must be weary of when getting rough in bed. To choke or not to choke… it’s a yes for me however there’s a difference between a firm grip on the neck and a full two hand choke out. Proper way to choke is to wrap your hand around their throat and squeeze the sides do not press down on the front of the neck, the pleasure comes from the lack of blood flow not the lack of oxygen. Start light and test the temp, even ask in your sexiest voice “you like how I choke you?”

Slaps, smacks and taps

This one isn’t easy, because personally I think the ass needs a good smacking when things are getting really good. But a NO for my partner to assume I’d also be down to get slapped in the face in all the excitement. (It has happened!) I was not a fan… I didn’t interrupt our session but definitely addressed it after.

I’ve also encountered a partner that wouldn’t get rough enough. It’s my own fault for assuming every man will show the same aggression when fucking, the sex was great but just when I wanted to get a nice swift spanking he didn’t deliver, so I told him in the moment that he doesn’t have to be gentle, I knew that would give him the ammo he needed… he smirks and goes for it again with the same weak hand that I met a few minutes ago.

*eye roll and sigh*

Rough sex, BDSM starts as light as a a tight grip and can go as deep as using tools (clamps,bondage etc.) I feel like everyone likes some level of this. Find your sweet spot but always always communicate with your partner before you try anything new.

What rough shit are you into? And how do you spring your bdsm ways on a new partner? Is it different for men and women?

Let’s talk about it